2005-11-16 - 8:15 p.m.
"Do you remember why you came? Not to play follow the leader. No. No." - the Libertines, "Campaign of Hate"
Well now. You're back to where you were two years ago. Hide yourself. There's a lot of work to be done, and you keep pushing it back, pushing it away. Overloaded, overwhelmed, with schizophrenic nightmares wearing you down. I'd feel sorry, but I'm pathetic, too. There's no point in being an elitist fuck when all you want is to curl in the fetal position and feel nothing but someone's arms around you. Happiness stifles artistic thoughts, though. It also gets rid of the suicidal ones. Sweet.
I used to be that girl, but probably more hated. THAT girl - the nerdy chick with the glasses, ill-fitted pants, greasy hair. I'm still the quiet, awkward Asian chick in the back of the class, and sometimes I STILL fuck up the grading curve.
This day won't seem to end, and that's all I need - for this to be over, so I can sleep, so I can stop this exhaustive cycle. Somnambulist. These days seem too long, but I can never get everything done.
�
�
